Marriage Mockery

[Thawts]

( A scene at City Hall in San Francisco )

"Next."

"Good morning. We want to apply for a marriage license."

"Names?"

"Tim and Jim Jones."

"Jones? Are you related? I see a resemblance."

"Yes, we're brothers."

"Brothers? You can't get married."

"Why not? Aren't you giving marriage licenses to same gender couples?"

"Yes, thousands. But we haven't had any siblings. That's incest!"

"Incest?" No, we are not gay."

"Not gay? Then why do you want to get married?"

"For the financial benefits, of course. And we do love each other.
Besides, we don't have any other prospects."

"But we're issuing marriage licenses to gay and lesbian couples who've
been denied equal protection under the law. If you are not gay, you
can get married to a woman."

"Wait a minute. A gay man has the same right to marry a woman as I
have. But just because I'm straight doesn't mean I want to marry a
woman. I want to marry Jim."

"And I want to marry Tim, Are you going to discriminate against us
just because we are not gay?"

"All right, all right. I'll give you your license. Next."

"Hi. We are here to get married."

"Names?"

"John Smith, Jane James, Robert Green, and June Johnson."

"Who wants to marry whom?"

"We all want to marry each other."

"But there are four of you!"

"That's right. You see, we're all bisexual. I love Jane and Robert,
Jane loves me and June, June loves Robert and Jane, and Robert loves June
and me. All of us getting married together is the only way that we can
express our sexual preferences in a marital relationship."

"But we've only been granting licenses to gay and lesbian couples."

"So you're discriminating against bisexuals!"

"No, it's just that, well, the traditional idea of marriage is that
it's just for couples."

"Since when are you standing on tradition?"

"Well, I mean, you have to draw the line somewhere."

"Who says? There's no logical reason to limit marriage to couples.
The more the better. Besides, we demand our rights! The mayor says the
constitution guarantees equal protection under the law. Give us a
marriage license!"

"All right, all right. Next."

"Hello, I'd like a marriage license."

"In what names?"

"David Deets."

"And the other man?"

"That's all. I want to marry myself."

"Marry yourself? What do you mean?"

"Well, my psychiatrist says I have a dual personality, so I want to
marry the two together. Maybe I can file a joint income-tax return."

"That does it! I quit!! You people are making a mockery of marriage!!"

[champion]

Hey there, you forgot a few: Military marriages of convience - more money, medical benefits, you know - Repeat marriages - even up to ten spouses! Ten! Arranged marriages - in fact, some cultures find 'love marriages' to be a mockery -
Hey, if you want to bitch about people making a mockery of (what you believe) marriage should be, that's fine, but don't forget the Heterosexual house of marriage is made of glass.

[Thawts]

... aaannnddd ... the homo 'marriage' would be s.ooOOO much better ?

[joshbaumgartner]

... aaannnddd ... the homo 'marriage' would be s.ooOOO much better ?

You're busy making the case that Gay Marriage will be the same as Hetero Marriage.

Thank you,

Josh

[Thawts]

You're busy making the case that Gay Marriage will be the same as Hetero Marriage.

Thank you,

Josh

This is absurd! It is IMPOSSIBLE for a homo 'marriage' to be the SAME AS a hetero marriage, because a MARRIAGE is a commitment between God, ONE MAN and ONE WOMAN!
It is impossible to include God (jewish/Christian/Muslim) in a homo union, because it is an abomination to Him.
Not to mention, MORE than ONE man/woman and the other MISSING!

[amoxi]

i'm going to ignore your absurd scenario and say this: if you are so stubborn and blinded by your 'fear for the lord' that you have difficulties recognizing true, unadulterated love between two consenting adult individuals, perhaps you should reevaluate your faith.
i invite you to visit my beautiful city by the bay, to see these loving partnerships flourish first-hand. you'll see. :)

[joshbaumgartner]

i invite you to visit my beautiful city by the bay, to see these loving partnerships flourish first-hand. you'll see. :)

I second the motion, I loved SF when I lived in Alameda, and I don't pass up a chance to visit when I'm passing through Cali (LA on the other hand I can do without).

In general, in those cities where gays and other communities have broad acceptance as opposed to being relegated to districts of town, life is better for both gay and straight, and the problems often attributed to gays in intolerant communities are not prevalent. Portland is another town where segregation is lessened, and as a consequence, it has a much better community atmosphere downtown than where I now live (Dallas) where every community is an isolated and insular island and there is no real city-wide sense of community.

Josh

[Export]

Hmmmm.....San Fransisco and Portland both sounds pretty good! Please add my favourite West Coast city of Vancouver, B.C., to the list of community-centric places!

[joshbaumgartner]

Hmmmm.....San Fransisco and Portland both sounds pretty good! Please add my favourite West Coast city of Vancouver, B.C., to the list of community-centric places!

Vancouver is beautiful! I have enjoyed visiting both it and the rest of B.C.